five tips for great wedding vendor relationships

...for brides, grooms, and vendors from the perspective of a wedding photographer.

my bride and i are both wedding vendors: ade and gina, i am a wedding photographer and she is a bridal makeup artist. as wedding vendors who recently got married, here we will provide a perspective from both side of the fence. when we got married a few days ago, we knew what to expect from vendors and how we should act because of we are in the industry. vendors in the industry tend to forget or don’t know that our business thrives in not just making immediate money from the bride and groom we are currently serving; it is also from the referrals they send us after their wedding.  if we provide excellent and friendly customer service, the bride and groom become customers for life, as well as they refer us to their friends.  the vendors who fail, to retain this simple concept, also fail as vendors for that particular wedding. here are five tips for brides on how to deal with vendors as well as how vendors shoudl deal with brides:

1. vendors don't get upset when bride and groom changes an aspect of your service:  even if it cuts into your earnings, simply smile and move on or offer an alternative service. if you get frustrated at any point and appear to be angry this will give a negative vibe on your part and more than likely they will not recommend you. simply have your contracts in order and charge your worth. so if anything is cancelled your worth for the remaining service is properly compensated.  by sharp contrast our florist bill of deihl flowers was extremely patient with gina. she changed the original bridal party bouquets, and finally added more flowers in the end. he was available to meet with her more than once, spoke to her by phone and catered to what she needed.

2. vendors go above and beyond:  as a wedding vendor i was taught, "the bride and groom is only your friend if you do what they want." there is truth to that but in my own practices i have taken a different approach. the bride and groom will respect your expertise and align themself with you vision; if you create an environment which shows that you know what you are doing, you are friendly and you provide a valuable service. as a vendor, in order to accomplish this: you must first educate the bride and groom as well as provide impeccable customer service.  our cake artist, cakes by margie when above and beyond. she created a chat group via text message because she knew gina (who did her own makeup by the way) and i were in different locations when she need to make suggestions or ask questions.  we told her our vision for our cake decorations (toppings), she gathered the materials, even though this was beyond her expertise and made them.  she reached out to a friend of hers, formed an alliance. said friend ended up providing the specialty bases for our cake, and base for our table vases. she did not wait for us to email her and ask questions, she reached out to us, send us educational videos and made different suggestions. iher actions made us feel like we were part of our own cake development, yet she still maintained her expertise and completed her artistic vision. which leads me to the next point.

3.  brides, trust your vendors expertise: even if you are skilled in the particular area, understand that it is their vision and this is why you hired them. brides as a collective, rarely ever get the chance to tell the dress maker how they want their wedding gown made. so why would they micromanage other vendors? why should they tell a photographer how they want their wedding shot? this does not mean that you should not get involve, simply state what you want and what’s very important to you and then let them work. i gave our Dj, Dj Kevin a list of songs thats special to us that we wanted played during the wedding that is special to us. i also told him to “ figure out when is best to play them based on your expert knowledge."  He did it so well that the bride and I danced almost the entire time.

another example, during reversal a few of the bridal party/groomsmen suggested where they should take photographs. being a wedding photographer, i knew they had no knowledge of lighting and light could easily change in the beautiful area they wanted to take photographs. so i quickly and respectfully interjected, "let adachi, [adachi photography] pick the spot."  it so happen the beautiful area where the brides maid and groomsmen  men wanted to go, was flooded with harsh sunlight by the time we were ready to take bridal party photographs.

4. brides treat your vendors like guest: simply because they are human beings. additionally, this has a ripple effect, if you treat them well they will work harder for you. i told my caterer, "make sure my vendors eat before my guest." now this may seem strange.  however, take for example: when i was interning to become a wedding photographer, some years ago; sometimes myself and the lead photographer would be scurried off in another room and fed after the guest had eaten. imagine this scenario, if dinner starts at 5pm and is finished serving by 5:40 and cake cutting or whatever starts right after. the people who are strongly responsible for making your day special (photographer, Dj, wedding planner, full day makeup artist, videographer)  are served at 5:45 and then has to 10 minutes to rush and eat and then get back to work. also note, if your wedding started at 1pm these vendors mentioned had to be up at around by 5am, travelling, preparing and arriving at LEAST 2 hrs early to the venue. Feed your vendors the same time as your guest or before, make sure they have a place to sit, it does not have to be in the same room as guest but make sure they are catered to. you want them to be ready to start back working immediately after dinner.

5. brides, tip your vendors: if you like your vendors services, tip them or send them gifts, let them know that they are appreciated.

a very special thank you to our dear friends dwayne blackman and clewin mcpherson who served as our master of ceremony and officiant.  lisa o’brien, songstress, and russell schmidt, guitarist as well as keturah for linens and most importantly our wedding planner judy edwards, your work was amazing!